a new begining

To start this right I need to go back in time just a few months, about mid June my son was born and in late September my little sister who was in her late 20’s died in a car wreck where she was at fault. She was a wife a mother and brand new to the Christian faith. She Died a Week before she was going to be baptized that day was also my birthday.
At her Church they make videos of you saying why you want to be baptized. She Said why and thanked my wife and my self for being influences that helped bring her to God. That video was the lat words I ever heard my sister say.

The pain and grief I went threw brought some things to the surface of my life. I have anger issues and I have a long-term addiction to pornography. I probably drink a little more than I ought to also. As far as the anger goes I am not abusive but I am explosive. I do not want my wife to have to deal with that any long I also do not want to teach my son the traits that have been handed down in my family. The Pornography is destructive to my marriage and to my self; it is a sin against my self-hurting my own soul. I am not an alcoholic I have two parents who are and have an opiate addict for a brother. I have had friends who were meth addicts and heroine addicts. So addiction is something I am used to and know well. I am thankful that God had put people like that in my life because there actions are what helped keep me straight.

The road to redemption, I found my self about 3 weeks after my sisters’ death drunk in the garage yelling at God. This resulted in and argument with my wife and me blowing up. I then called a Christian mentor of mine who also counsels people and told him my problems. We started counseling two weeks later. This blog will be an account of my life my growth threw this process and what the lord is teaching me, showing me, and just doing in my life.